Before the World began

Taken from one of my favourite songs: Before the world began you were on his mind, every tear you cry is precious in his eyes.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Rugby Aftermath

Had a cool moment last nite. On our way back from watching the rugby final at a friend's house we told our son that if we saw anyone on the streets we would yell out the window "Go the Crusaders" and yell. He thought the whole idea was great so the first guy we saw at the lights I yelled at the top of my lungs and then went "WHOA!!!" Our son was rolling round the car in hysterics and asked if we could do it again and he could join in. So next time it was a guy on a bike and the three of us did it together. He was laughing heaps again and our two daughters in the back seat slept on oblivious to all the excitement. Great moment!


I am not sure what it is about me and supermarkets. Almost 3 years ago I was at Pak 'n Save with my then two kids and the younger of the two was crying and being generally naughty. I tried every conceivable way to get her to be quiet and behave and then decided to just get the shopping finished and out of there as soon as possible. Adding to this whole scenario was the fact that I had a terrible cold and felt dreadful myself. While I was packing the groceries a gentleman in his late 50s approached me and laid into me about the behaviour of my kids and what a terrible mum I was. He said "all the problems of society are caused by parents like you" and then proceeded to inform me that my kids just need more discipline. I started to cry and kept asking him what he expected me to do as I had already tried smacking my daughter. He still kept ranting and raving that I was doing a bad job of bringing the kids up. I was very distraught by this time but God placed a lovely lady from Opawa Baptist just outside the door so as I exited I ran into her loving arms and she lifted my spirits. On the way home I then managed to formulate how I would react to this situation if it occured again as I had been taken completely by surprise this time.

Well yes it did happen again and not just once. The next time was at Fresh Choice about 6 months later - also by an elderly man. This time I just told him it is very difficult to shop with little ones and if he hadn't interrupted me I might get finished sooner and out of his way. Then about a year ago it happened at Countdown and this time the lady kept following me and putting in her two bobs worth about what I could do to stop my daughter crying and kept telling her that I was a nice mum and she should be good for me. I told her that it was lovely that she thought I was such a good mum but it really was not her right to tell my children off and that she was not helping the situation.

By this time I realised that I now have no other supermarkets to shop at so I would just have to brave it. I am not sure if I have a sign on my back that says PLEASE PLEASE tell me what you think of me and how I should parent my kids. Those who don't know me will by now think my kids are brats but they are not really - just not lovers of supermarkets. I know someone who never took their under-fives shopping at all but I find that some important life lessons have been learned whilst out shopping so have persisted in taking them with me.

Anyhow yesterday I went back to Countdown and whilst waiting at the checkout I heard the lady next to me say something to my oldest daughter (the one everyone else has complained about) but since I hadn't heard what she said I let it go but moments later she spoke again so I politely turned to her and said "What did you say". She told me that she had just told my daughter to leave her baby sister alone. This time I thought stuff it I felt like a battle so I said strongly "It is none of your business". She replied with "but she was hurting the baby". I then said "Actually I told you to mind your own business, I don't know why when I come to the supermarket people think it is their right to pass judgement on me or my kids. You have no right to tell her off." She was very taken aback by this but I felt so good.

I hope it is alright to stand up for yourself like that - I certainly felt better this time than I ever have in the past. When we got to the car my daughter said "Mum why did you say to that lady 'Mind your own business" so I explained that I don't like other people growling at my kids. She had such a lovely smile on her face that I had stuck up for her and I realised that in this situation I had protected my child and it was the right thing to do.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Great morning

I have just had a great morning in the sunshine with lots of other parents watching our kids play soccer. It was great to see so many kids having a go and getting into the spirit of the play and the great lessons they are learning in co-operation, sharing, encouragement, fair play and determination. I was given the honored role of picking the player of the day and since my son had won it last week it wasn't allowed to be him so nobody could accuse me of being biased. The wee boy we awarded it to scored 3 goals and kicked the ball so many times. He is not the biggest on the team but really knows how to get stuck in and give everything a go. The way his face lit up when he was praised and when he scored the goal was an enormous delight to see. The kids are all 4 or 5 years old and I love the way they clap their hands after a goal is scored and have hugs all round.
I was feeling a little down last night after a conversation I have got involved in over at which stirred up for me old memories. It is good I think to be brave enough to discuss these issues even if we don't always agree and I have learnt thru comments by Iain that it is important to have standards and ideals even if it is hard to explain these to those around us. Just because someone has suffered something horrible often we feel we have to shy away from any discussion on these sort of topics in respect to them. We also try sometimes to be too politically correct and it is a breath of fresh air sometimes to meet someone like Iain who is prepared to stand and put his opinions out there even if not everyone agrees with us.
I am really enjoying the sunshine today even though I am blocked up with a cold.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Lesbian Tax

Just heard recently about a company that tacks 'lesbian tax' onto their quotes when they know that the said couple are lesbians. The people at this company are not Christians. Anyone brave enough to tell me what they think about this!

Thursday, May 26, 2005


Just thought I would let you know that I have fixed this blog so anyone can make a post - even anonymous people so Elizabeth if you are reading this blog amongst all the others you keep an eye on you are more than welcome to comment. I am really pleased the sun is shining today. I don't like dreary days.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Nice houses

A new activity my hubby and I have taken up is surfing the real estate pages of NZ. Started off at us looking for something in particular but has now become looking for the most expensive homes that NZ has to offer. It's very interesting as you look at the pics of the best of the best for sale in our great country and the absolute opulance that some people live in. The interesting bit for me has been how much I don't actually desire it. Even if I had that kind of money none of it actually looks warm, inviting or really what I would want. I know that it very easy to say when there is no way I would ever have the chance to live in these sorts of home. But it has shown me that I am happy with what I have. I also know that if I had more dough than what I do there are definitely a multitude of other things I would want to spend it on and I could never live like that while there are others in such need all around us. Besides if I lived in houses like the ones I was looking at I would definitely need two cleaners, a groundsman, a nanny and two ironing boards (for the two cleaners of course).

How much alcohol is too much?

Have just been watching Police 10/7. There was a sad case about an 18 yr male who was raped just outside Chch after being picked up by an unknown male in central city whilst drunk. He thought he was being dropped home and instead was taken for a long drive etc. This occured between 3 am and 4 am.

As a NZ culture we endorse drinking and seem to think that it is okay to occasionally get drunk as long as we don't do it all the time. But is it safe to get drunk and is it even safe to be out after say 1 pm? My mum used to tell me in my late teens and early 20s that anything done after midnight was probably something I shouldn't be doing. At the time I didn't really agree with her cos it was what I wanted to do but now I think she definitely had a point. How much of what we do late at night should we be doing? (including blogging). I do feel very sorry for anyone who whilst under the influence of alcohol or drugs has something terrible happen to them but I do question what we bring upon ourselves. Now before you think I am getting holier than thou I am an ex-drinker who unfortunately had a bad experience whilst under the influence of alcohol and have therefore made the decision to no longer drink alcohol at all. This decision was only made after seeing the damage it did to me and those around me.

What do you think? Give me your thoughts of alcohol and the effects it has on our society and whether there are guidelines that should be upheld. What do you think about being out late at night? Personally I have found over the last year that I am fearful if we are ever out near the central city late because I am frightened I will be hit by a drunk driver or my car surrounded by a group of unruly teens.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

What is Normal?

Welcome to my first blog!! I have been giving some thought lately to the word 'normal' and what actually constitutes normal. You will often hear people say "but at least you're normal" or "I was surprised to hear you are a Christian cos you're so normal". What on earth does that mean.

All my life I have had an enormous desire to fit in (to be classed normal and acceptable), to stand out in the crowd for being cool or okay but not for being abnormal. I seem to have spent alot of my teenage years, in particular, striving for approval from others - for them to accept me for who I am. I am not a cool, hip, trendy chick at all. In fact I believe in comfort over and above everything. I am a strong-minded person who is not afraid to say what she thinks even if it is not the status-quo but in all that I tried to fit the stereotype of what a cool, normal person is like.

As you will probably note I am also a Christian which brings me to the word 'normal' again. Is it normal in today's society to be a Christian and in choosing this journey for myself am I even called to be normal or am I called to be different. My husband and I have just starting attending a new church and the Pastor there spoke a few weeks ago on Samson and what it meant to be a Nazarene. This was certainly something that set you apart as not at all normal. If you were a Nazarene you stood out like a very sore thumb - everyone knew who you were. Is this the way we should all be living. I feel that YES we should be different to the status-quo around us, we should stand out as unusual. Not in the clothes we wear or the way we walk but in the language we use, the graciousness we show, the way we behave, the things that catch our passion, the things we pour our hours of time into.

So that brings me back to my original question and a new one. Am I normal? Once I would have said I hope so but now I say NO I am not and I don't have to be!! I am who I am which comprises many different facets as some of those who know me will attest to. I am most importantly a daughter of the King of Kings and as that I am what he calls normal and that is what counts.